I, ROBOT...THERE'S A JOKE TO BE MADE THERE, BUT I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS
Being that I'm an avid movie buff (as long as the movies are American and made after 1980) and my girlfriend is now back in St. Louis some four hours away from me, I decided to throw down my hard earned money and go see the latest Hollywood offering. I had nothing better to do. It was just a way to kill a Saturday night...
Oh, who the hell am I kidding. I've been genuinely looking forward to this movie for a while now. Not that I love Will Smith or anything, despite the fact that we share the same name. He's okay. He's no Jeff Goldblum, but Christ who is? I really just wanted to see it because I'm fascinated with the idea of artificial consciousness. Not fascinated enough to read books about it or research it in any way, but I'll go see a two hour movie about it.
The movie was actually pretty good. It had a little bit more character than I expected. And Will Smith does a okay job. Not quite as good as he did in Wild Wild West, but that was a once in a lifetime performance. A movie like that can never be equaled in any way, shape, or form.
All the ads that I've seen for I, Robot picture Will Smith, and that's fine, but his is not the most memorable character in the film. Whose is, you ask...the cocky kid played by a little boy named Shia LeBeouf.
That's right ladies and gentleman, little Louis Stevens steals the show right away from Bagger Vance. Shia gets all the best lines. Case in point: after Bridget Moynahan (or as I like to call her "that bitchy chick from Coyote Ugly") shoots this robot that was trying to kill Bagger Vance, Shia says "Dude, she totally just shot at you with her eyes closed." Pure genius. I bet that line wasn't even in the script. I bet my man Shia just made that shit up off the top of his head. God I love that kid. Sadly though he's absent from most of the movie, and I think it's because of this the movie loses something.
Here's an idea...what's the one thing every cop has? A partner. At least they always do in the movies. I think at some point, oh around the hour mark, we should find out that Shia knows something about the robots that nobody else knows, and because of this the incredibly anal and by-the-book captain appoints Shia to be Bagger Vance's new partner. Huh, what about that? Shia could follow Bagger around, making all kinds of hilarious jokes, and get himself into all kinds of awkward situations on account of his big mouth. Just like P-Boy did for six seasons on Dangerous Chaos.
But for some reason none of that happens. He's only in the movie for like five mintues...if that. They don't give Shia the screen time that he so obviously deserves. Bastards.
Still the movie was okay. Apart from the whole Shia thing, the only other thing missing was Steve Zahn walking into the frame every few minutes saying "ssshhhiiittt."
DID I LISTEN TO POP MUSIC BECAUSE I WAS MISERABLE OR...
I like a pretty specific kind of music. I'll listen to anything, don't get me wrong, but there's a very specific sound that I love. I'd try to describe it, but for the life of me I can't think of any good adjectives. So, in lue of that I'll offer some names: Elliot Smith, Nick Drake, Smog, Travis...you get the point. This is good music, and I don't think anyone can make a valid argument against that.
But here's the thing: my girlfriend says it makes her want to kill herself.
And I have to say I see her point. It's certainly not happy music. I mean some of it is about love and being happy, but it's predominately somber.
But it got me thinking...is there a reason that I like this music? I mean, I know I like it because something about it appeals to me, but what is it? I don't know. Maybe I genuinely like it. Maybe I think that, in a way, it says more than some of the other music that's out there. Or maybe I like it because it's some kind of musical manifestation of my constant desire for drama. There's more emotion in it than some other kinds of music...at least more conflicting emotion.
I honestly don't know what it is. I think a lot of that stems from the fact that I don't know shit about music. I just know what I like, although I have no idea why I like it.
COMPETITIVE EATING 2: THE NEW BATCH
One thing I forgot to mention in my last post about this whole competitive eating thing: instead of competiting to see who can eat the most food in some given amount of time, why not give that food to people who might be, oh I don't know...fucking starving.
Homeless for instance. Or poor people who have homes but lack the money to feed their nineteen and a half children. How about that? Wouldn't that be a better use for hundreds, literally hundreds, of pounds of food? Am I alone here? Am I all by myself?
Just a thought.
Being that I'm an avid movie buff (as long as the movies are American and made after 1980) and my girlfriend is now back in St. Louis some four hours away from me, I decided to throw down my hard earned money and go see the latest Hollywood offering. I had nothing better to do. It was just a way to kill a Saturday night...
Oh, who the hell am I kidding. I've been genuinely looking forward to this movie for a while now. Not that I love Will Smith or anything, despite the fact that we share the same name. He's okay. He's no Jeff Goldblum, but Christ who is? I really just wanted to see it because I'm fascinated with the idea of artificial consciousness. Not fascinated enough to read books about it or research it in any way, but I'll go see a two hour movie about it.
The movie was actually pretty good. It had a little bit more character than I expected. And Will Smith does a okay job. Not quite as good as he did in Wild Wild West, but that was a once in a lifetime performance. A movie like that can never be equaled in any way, shape, or form.
All the ads that I've seen for I, Robot picture Will Smith, and that's fine, but his is not the most memorable character in the film. Whose is, you ask...the cocky kid played by a little boy named Shia LeBeouf.
That's right ladies and gentleman, little Louis Stevens steals the show right away from Bagger Vance. Shia gets all the best lines. Case in point: after Bridget Moynahan (or as I like to call her "that bitchy chick from Coyote Ugly") shoots this robot that was trying to kill Bagger Vance, Shia says "Dude, she totally just shot at you with her eyes closed." Pure genius. I bet that line wasn't even in the script. I bet my man Shia just made that shit up off the top of his head. God I love that kid. Sadly though he's absent from most of the movie, and I think it's because of this the movie loses something.
Here's an idea...what's the one thing every cop has? A partner. At least they always do in the movies. I think at some point, oh around the hour mark, we should find out that Shia knows something about the robots that nobody else knows, and because of this the incredibly anal and by-the-book captain appoints Shia to be Bagger Vance's new partner. Huh, what about that? Shia could follow Bagger around, making all kinds of hilarious jokes, and get himself into all kinds of awkward situations on account of his big mouth. Just like P-Boy did for six seasons on Dangerous Chaos.
But for some reason none of that happens. He's only in the movie for like five mintues...if that. They don't give Shia the screen time that he so obviously deserves. Bastards.
Still the movie was okay. Apart from the whole Shia thing, the only other thing missing was Steve Zahn walking into the frame every few minutes saying "ssshhhiiittt."
DID I LISTEN TO POP MUSIC BECAUSE I WAS MISERABLE OR...
I like a pretty specific kind of music. I'll listen to anything, don't get me wrong, but there's a very specific sound that I love. I'd try to describe it, but for the life of me I can't think of any good adjectives. So, in lue of that I'll offer some names: Elliot Smith, Nick Drake, Smog, Travis...you get the point. This is good music, and I don't think anyone can make a valid argument against that.
But here's the thing: my girlfriend says it makes her want to kill herself.
And I have to say I see her point. It's certainly not happy music. I mean some of it is about love and being happy, but it's predominately somber.
But it got me thinking...is there a reason that I like this music? I mean, I know I like it because something about it appeals to me, but what is it? I don't know. Maybe I genuinely like it. Maybe I think that, in a way, it says more than some of the other music that's out there. Or maybe I like it because it's some kind of musical manifestation of my constant desire for drama. There's more emotion in it than some other kinds of music...at least more conflicting emotion.
I honestly don't know what it is. I think a lot of that stems from the fact that I don't know shit about music. I just know what I like, although I have no idea why I like it.
COMPETITIVE EATING 2: THE NEW BATCH
One thing I forgot to mention in my last post about this whole competitive eating thing: instead of competiting to see who can eat the most food in some given amount of time, why not give that food to people who might be, oh I don't know...fucking starving.
Homeless for instance. Or poor people who have homes but lack the money to feed their nineteen and a half children. How about that? Wouldn't that be a better use for hundreds, literally hundreds, of pounds of food? Am I alone here? Am I all by myself?
Just a thought.
