I mean, that sounds gay. I just want you to know this is like the first conversation of like three conversations that leads to you being gay. Like...there's this and then in a year it's like, "Oh you know, I kinda wanna, ya know, get back out there but I think I like guys," and then there's the big, "Oh I'm I'm a gay guy now."
-40 Year Old Virgin
YOU KNOW HOW I KNOW YOU'RE GAY?
I have decided, for at least the third time in as many months, that I’m done with women.
My reasons for doing so are three fold.
First of all, I think that all women are inherently crazy. And I don’t mean this in a strictly negative way. I don’t think that every woman in the world should be committed to a rubber room or anything. I’m not talking about that kind of crazy. The term ‘crazy’, to me at least, applies to any person whose actions cannot be logically explained. Now, this probably isn’t how Webster’s defines it and more than likely anyone who has taken Psych 101 can come up with a better explanation for what exactly “crazy” entails, but my definition suits me just fine. It might not be entirely accurate, but it does serve as an effective catchall. Women do all manner of shit that makes no logical sense whatsoever. I’m sure the same could be said about men, but I’m not trying to date any men, so therefore I don’t concern myself with the illogicalities of their actions.
Secondly, I don’t feel like putting forth the effort anymore. Not that I put up a front whenever I interact with members of the opposite sex. I’m pretty much myself no matter who I’m with and, if anything, I’m convinced a well thought out and executed act could only improve my chances with girls. But that’s not who I am. I’m not that guy. I am, however, tired of trying. I’m just sick of it. Either they’re not interested in me or they don’t think I’m serious in my pursuit or, and I know this might be hard to believe, I’m not interested in them. It’s true.
Finally, and perhaps most practically, I’m graduating in three weeks. I honestly don’t have time to be updating this blog, let alone begin a relationship--or anything that even vaguely resembles a relationship. As someone much wiser than myself pointed out not too long ago, what the hell am I going to do with a girl for three weeks? Granted, that’s just about how long it would take me to scare her off. Three weeks roughly translates into about two hundred movie quotes and no less than half a dozen references to Dangerous Chaos, which is more than enough to destroy any relationship. So why bother? I’m out of here of here soon enough. At least I hope so…
Anyway, that’s it. I’m done with women…at least for now. By the time you read this I’ll probably have changed my mind, but as of this moment I’m serious.
And, for the record, this decision in no way means that I now like guys.
IT'S NOT THAT I'M LAZY. IT'S THAT I JUST DON'T CARE
Believe it or not, I had this whole entry planned out about how I'm not a very good writer because I have no actual desire to write--which is a desire I imagine most writers have. Then I was going to explain that this lack of drive doesn't bother me because I realize it doesn't only apply to writing. I honestly don’t want to do anything. And I don’t want to do anything because I don’t care about anything enough to put forth the effort to do it.
To be fair, I think about things quite a bit, but rarely do my thoughts manifest themselves in the physical world.
Ultimately, I was planning on talking about how I don’t think this lack of desire is a bad thing. It’s not that I don’t want to accomplish anything. There are actually a great many things that I want to do. It’s that I’m just too rundown right now to do any of them. I’m fucking fatigued. And sooner or later it’s going to wear off, but for the time being I just don’t have the energy to do much.
I was going to write about all this, explaining it all in great detail, with numerous movie quotes and humorous asides, but then it occurred to me that I didn’t really feel like it.
Which, if nothing else, only further illustrates my point.
I don’t really know what the moral of this story is. Maybe there is none.
Or maybe it's whatever you want it to be...
-40 Year Old Virgin
YOU KNOW HOW I KNOW YOU'RE GAY?
I have decided, for at least the third time in as many months, that I’m done with women.
My reasons for doing so are three fold.
First of all, I think that all women are inherently crazy. And I don’t mean this in a strictly negative way. I don’t think that every woman in the world should be committed to a rubber room or anything. I’m not talking about that kind of crazy. The term ‘crazy’, to me at least, applies to any person whose actions cannot be logically explained. Now, this probably isn’t how Webster’s defines it and more than likely anyone who has taken Psych 101 can come up with a better explanation for what exactly “crazy” entails, but my definition suits me just fine. It might not be entirely accurate, but it does serve as an effective catchall. Women do all manner of shit that makes no logical sense whatsoever. I’m sure the same could be said about men, but I’m not trying to date any men, so therefore I don’t concern myself with the illogicalities of their actions.
Secondly, I don’t feel like putting forth the effort anymore. Not that I put up a front whenever I interact with members of the opposite sex. I’m pretty much myself no matter who I’m with and, if anything, I’m convinced a well thought out and executed act could only improve my chances with girls. But that’s not who I am. I’m not that guy. I am, however, tired of trying. I’m just sick of it. Either they’re not interested in me or they don’t think I’m serious in my pursuit or, and I know this might be hard to believe, I’m not interested in them. It’s true.
Finally, and perhaps most practically, I’m graduating in three weeks. I honestly don’t have time to be updating this blog, let alone begin a relationship--or anything that even vaguely resembles a relationship. As someone much wiser than myself pointed out not too long ago, what the hell am I going to do with a girl for three weeks? Granted, that’s just about how long it would take me to scare her off. Three weeks roughly translates into about two hundred movie quotes and no less than half a dozen references to Dangerous Chaos, which is more than enough to destroy any relationship. So why bother? I’m out of here of here soon enough. At least I hope so…
Anyway, that’s it. I’m done with women…at least for now. By the time you read this I’ll probably have changed my mind, but as of this moment I’m serious.
And, for the record, this decision in no way means that I now like guys.
IT'S NOT THAT I'M LAZY. IT'S THAT I JUST DON'T CARE
Believe it or not, I had this whole entry planned out about how I'm not a very good writer because I have no actual desire to write--which is a desire I imagine most writers have. Then I was going to explain that this lack of drive doesn't bother me because I realize it doesn't only apply to writing. I honestly don’t want to do anything. And I don’t want to do anything because I don’t care about anything enough to put forth the effort to do it.
To be fair, I think about things quite a bit, but rarely do my thoughts manifest themselves in the physical world.
Ultimately, I was planning on talking about how I don’t think this lack of desire is a bad thing. It’s not that I don’t want to accomplish anything. There are actually a great many things that I want to do. It’s that I’m just too rundown right now to do any of them. I’m fucking fatigued. And sooner or later it’s going to wear off, but for the time being I just don’t have the energy to do much.
I was going to write about all this, explaining it all in great detail, with numerous movie quotes and humorous asides, but then it occurred to me that I didn’t really feel like it.
Which, if nothing else, only further illustrates my point.
I don’t really know what the moral of this story is. Maybe there is none.
Or maybe it's whatever you want it to be...
