NO BLOG
Seeing as how I’ve been pretty busy lately, I recently toyed with the idea of not blogging anymore unless I was at home for an extended break. When I first started this blog, I really thought that I had a lot of stuff to say. I thought that I had fun and witty insights into the world at large, and even when I didn’t I could still fall back on a dick and fart joke or two.
But now, two years later, I don’t think I have all that much to say. My life is pretty boring. It’s just kind of this never ending cycle. It just keeps going round and round. Nothing exciting ever happens, which is just as well because if something exciting did ever happen I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.
But is that really the kind of thing you want to write about?
So then I started thinking about it some more, and I decided that keeping my blog would be a good thing. If I didn’t have anything to write about, I’d find something to write about. It’s like a little personal challenge. Oh and by the way, I’m gonna try to post more. That’s right. I’m going to try to find a time once a week and post.
If I were you, I wouldn’t really count on that though. Most of my plans never work out…
NO MIZZOU
I never wanted to come to Mizzou. But in all fairness I never really wanted to go anywhere else either.
Sometime between when I was born and when I entered, let’s say, the second grade, my parents decided that I was going to go to college. It really wasn’t much of a decision for them. Both of my parents are college educated. And as of right now both of them graduated with better grades than I probably will, and don’t think for a second they don’t hold that over me.
But when it finally came time for me to graduate high school, I really didn’t have anywhere that I wanted to go. I toured three schools: MU, CMSU, and UMKC. I toured them in that order so naturally the tours got increasingly shittier as I went along. I knew I didn’t want to go to UMKC. My dad went there, and at the age of eighteen I was making it a point never to do anything that my dad did. So that narrowed it down to two.
The determining factor was something that should never be a determining factor: a girl. Junior year of high school I was quite smitten by this slutty little minx that more or less ripped my seventeen year old life apart. A year later I was still bitter about the whole thing, but I still liked her. I knew that she was going to CMSU, and furthermore I knew that if I went to CMSU she would think that I was going there just because of her. She wouldn’t have been totally wrong in thinking this, but I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction.
Thus, I came to Mizzou.
So there you have it. The only reason any of you know me is because once upon a time a girl treated me really shitty.
NO COWBOY HATS
As many of you know, the other night I went to see a production of As You Like It. I’d known that I was going to have to do this for a while. It was required for my playwriting class, I had to go, and believe it or not I was kind of looking forward to it. I happen to be a big fan of Shakespeare. Granted, most of my experience with the man has been limited to what Kenneth Branagh and Baz Luhrmann have to offer, but that’s not entirely a bad thing. I respect Shakespeare’s work and I acknowledge the fact that he was probably a better writer than both Smith and Sorkin, although I hate to admit it. On occasion I have even gone so far as to say that I don’t think Shakespeare plays should be performed at high schools. This is a radical idea I know, but can you honestly tell me that your standard issue high school acting class is going to be able to properly handle The Bard’s material?
So I find out a few days before the play that it isn’t just As You Like It…it’s As You Like It: Country and Western style. After finding this out I went through several phases. The first of course was denial, the second was wondering whether or not a just God would allow such a thing to happen., and inevitably the third was acceptance. This last phase didn’t happen until I was actually at the theatre and I saw the rocks, sand dunes and cactuses littering the stage.
Despite my desire to leave, I sat through the whole thing…and it was awful. And I don’t mean a little bit. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. Not only was the play broken up every few minutes by musical interludes, but the climax was half a shootout and the whole sad spectacle ended with a hoedown.
Given my reservations about having an average group of high schoolers performing this play, you can only imagine how upset I was by this. All things considered though, I guess it could have been worse. It could have been As You Like It: In Space
NO HOT GIRLS
Today I redid the bulletin board on my half of the room. For months it was Lines From Really Awful Short Stories. But I got tired of those and now my new bulletin board is Ugly Girls From Hot or Not. Yeah, I know I need to work on my titles.
For the record, I’m fascinated by Hot or Not. I’m not really sure why. I think it might have something to do with not understanding the need to have your picture up on the internet so that thousands of people can tell you how hot they think you are. I know how hot I am, which isn’t to say that I think I’m hot. But I don’t need a bunch of people I’ve never met telling me how high I rank based on a single picture.
For the record, I make it point not to be boxed in by the standard practices of that website. If I see a girl on there, and let’s say she’s pretty damn hot, she’s showing some skin, maybe some cleavage, and making a cute little face and more or less looks like the kind of girl that was either a cheerleader or high class stripper at one point…I give her a low score. Contrast that with a girl who’s naturally cute and just being herself. This girl gets a high score. Now the truly ugly people, that’s just a toss up. If they’re just kind of plain, they get a low score. But if they’re so ugly that it’s bordering on pathetic, I’ll go ahead and give them a ten. I guess all this is just my way of balancing out the universe.
Anyway, back to my point: if you want to see a bunch of ugly girls from hot or not they’re up on my wall. And they’re pretty scary so I don’t know how long they’re gonna be up there.
NO SCREENPLAY
Over winter break I started working on my third screenplay. In three weeks I wrote almost seventy pages. We’ve been back at school for something like seven weeks now and I’ve only written twenty more pages.
Now I didn’t expect to keep up that kind of pace. I’m not stupid. And if I had any time to work on it I would. But I don’t. So I can’t. Really there‘s nothing I can do about it. My screenplay is just sitting there, unfinished. Which is how it’s going to be until spring break.
That just makes me kinda sad.
NO ROADS
I’ve been playing some old school Oregon Trail. And when I say old school I’m talking about fourth grade apple computer Oregon Trail. In the past twelve years or so I totally forgot how much fun this game was. Granted all you do is watch as your little wagon rolls along to the next landmark but it’s still really enjoyable. It kind of makes me wish I was a kid again. Not a kid now. I don’t want to be a 2005 kid. I just want to relive my childhood.
But that’s nothing new. I’ve been wanting that for about the last four years.
Seeing as how I’ve been pretty busy lately, I recently toyed with the idea of not blogging anymore unless I was at home for an extended break. When I first started this blog, I really thought that I had a lot of stuff to say. I thought that I had fun and witty insights into the world at large, and even when I didn’t I could still fall back on a dick and fart joke or two.
But now, two years later, I don’t think I have all that much to say. My life is pretty boring. It’s just kind of this never ending cycle. It just keeps going round and round. Nothing exciting ever happens, which is just as well because if something exciting did ever happen I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.
But is that really the kind of thing you want to write about?
So then I started thinking about it some more, and I decided that keeping my blog would be a good thing. If I didn’t have anything to write about, I’d find something to write about. It’s like a little personal challenge. Oh and by the way, I’m gonna try to post more. That’s right. I’m going to try to find a time once a week and post.
If I were you, I wouldn’t really count on that though. Most of my plans never work out…
NO MIZZOU
I never wanted to come to Mizzou. But in all fairness I never really wanted to go anywhere else either.
Sometime between when I was born and when I entered, let’s say, the second grade, my parents decided that I was going to go to college. It really wasn’t much of a decision for them. Both of my parents are college educated. And as of right now both of them graduated with better grades than I probably will, and don’t think for a second they don’t hold that over me.
But when it finally came time for me to graduate high school, I really didn’t have anywhere that I wanted to go. I toured three schools: MU, CMSU, and UMKC. I toured them in that order so naturally the tours got increasingly shittier as I went along. I knew I didn’t want to go to UMKC. My dad went there, and at the age of eighteen I was making it a point never to do anything that my dad did. So that narrowed it down to two.
The determining factor was something that should never be a determining factor: a girl. Junior year of high school I was quite smitten by this slutty little minx that more or less ripped my seventeen year old life apart. A year later I was still bitter about the whole thing, but I still liked her. I knew that she was going to CMSU, and furthermore I knew that if I went to CMSU she would think that I was going there just because of her. She wouldn’t have been totally wrong in thinking this, but I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction.
Thus, I came to Mizzou.
So there you have it. The only reason any of you know me is because once upon a time a girl treated me really shitty.
NO COWBOY HATS
As many of you know, the other night I went to see a production of As You Like It. I’d known that I was going to have to do this for a while. It was required for my playwriting class, I had to go, and believe it or not I was kind of looking forward to it. I happen to be a big fan of Shakespeare. Granted, most of my experience with the man has been limited to what Kenneth Branagh and Baz Luhrmann have to offer, but that’s not entirely a bad thing. I respect Shakespeare’s work and I acknowledge the fact that he was probably a better writer than both Smith and Sorkin, although I hate to admit it. On occasion I have even gone so far as to say that I don’t think Shakespeare plays should be performed at high schools. This is a radical idea I know, but can you honestly tell me that your standard issue high school acting class is going to be able to properly handle The Bard’s material?
So I find out a few days before the play that it isn’t just As You Like It…it’s As You Like It: Country and Western style. After finding this out I went through several phases. The first of course was denial, the second was wondering whether or not a just God would allow such a thing to happen., and inevitably the third was acceptance. This last phase didn’t happen until I was actually at the theatre and I saw the rocks, sand dunes and cactuses littering the stage.
Despite my desire to leave, I sat through the whole thing…and it was awful. And I don’t mean a little bit. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. Not only was the play broken up every few minutes by musical interludes, but the climax was half a shootout and the whole sad spectacle ended with a hoedown.
Given my reservations about having an average group of high schoolers performing this play, you can only imagine how upset I was by this. All things considered though, I guess it could have been worse. It could have been As You Like It: In Space
NO HOT GIRLS
Today I redid the bulletin board on my half of the room. For months it was Lines From Really Awful Short Stories. But I got tired of those and now my new bulletin board is Ugly Girls From Hot or Not. Yeah, I know I need to work on my titles.
For the record, I’m fascinated by Hot or Not. I’m not really sure why. I think it might have something to do with not understanding the need to have your picture up on the internet so that thousands of people can tell you how hot they think you are. I know how hot I am, which isn’t to say that I think I’m hot. But I don’t need a bunch of people I’ve never met telling me how high I rank based on a single picture.
For the record, I make it point not to be boxed in by the standard practices of that website. If I see a girl on there, and let’s say she’s pretty damn hot, she’s showing some skin, maybe some cleavage, and making a cute little face and more or less looks like the kind of girl that was either a cheerleader or high class stripper at one point…I give her a low score. Contrast that with a girl who’s naturally cute and just being herself. This girl gets a high score. Now the truly ugly people, that’s just a toss up. If they’re just kind of plain, they get a low score. But if they’re so ugly that it’s bordering on pathetic, I’ll go ahead and give them a ten. I guess all this is just my way of balancing out the universe.
Anyway, back to my point: if you want to see a bunch of ugly girls from hot or not they’re up on my wall. And they’re pretty scary so I don’t know how long they’re gonna be up there.
NO SCREENPLAY
Over winter break I started working on my third screenplay. In three weeks I wrote almost seventy pages. We’ve been back at school for something like seven weeks now and I’ve only written twenty more pages.
Now I didn’t expect to keep up that kind of pace. I’m not stupid. And if I had any time to work on it I would. But I don’t. So I can’t. Really there‘s nothing I can do about it. My screenplay is just sitting there, unfinished. Which is how it’s going to be until spring break.
That just makes me kinda sad.
NO ROADS
I’ve been playing some old school Oregon Trail. And when I say old school I’m talking about fourth grade apple computer Oregon Trail. In the past twelve years or so I totally forgot how much fun this game was. Granted all you do is watch as your little wagon rolls along to the next landmark but it’s still really enjoyable. It kind of makes me wish I was a kid again. Not a kid now. I don’t want to be a 2005 kid. I just want to relive my childhood.
But that’s nothing new. I’ve been wanting that for about the last four years.
