SPRING BREAKDOWN
Spring Break is quite a misnomer. I've been busier the last few days than I usually am at school. I'd tell you what I've been up to, but I guarantee that none of it is what most people would call 'exciting'. I've been doing a lot of homework. A lot of writing. A lot of reading. By the time I get back to school, I'll have my homework finished for Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday...most of it anyway.
I read 25th Hour, which was kind of disappointing since it wasn't nearly as well done as the movie. In a lot of ways it was kinda like the Cliff's Notes version of the movie. That's never happened to me before. I mean, I know I've only read like seven books in my entire life, but at least some of those have been books upon which movies were based. Until the other day, I didn't think it was possible for an entire book to be less fleshed out than a movie. But I was wrong. And on top of that I'm a little upset with David Benioff. So much so that I'm not even going to bother finding out if I just spelled his name incorrectly.
If my setences seem brief and lacking in effort that could be because I wrote 30 pages today. 30 pages...that's a personal record. And it's not like I barely broke through my old record. I shattered it by nearly 15 pages. Needless to say, I'm a little tired of looking at this computer.
One more thing before I get to the bulk of the entry...I was just doing laundry and I was struck with an...I don't even know what it was. It was just one of those
things that makes you go 'wow, what are the odds'.
So there I am taking my clothes out of the washer and putting them into the dryer when I noticed: hey, no dryer sheets. So I yell up to my mother inquiring as to whether or not there are dryer sheets hiding somewhere in the house when she says 'we don't have any' in a tone that made me feel kinda stupid for asking in the first place. She said 'we don't have any dryer sheets' the way someone would say 'we don't have any bigfoot costumes'.
And as I was standing there wondering if it was worth the effort to drive to the nearest grocery store, my mother yelled back down 'don't you have any dryer sheets left?' To which I thought, wow what a stupid question, but then I realized that I had my laundry bag thing here with me.
If any of you have seen my laundry bag, you'd know that there's a little pouch on it that holds, among other things, dryer sheets. Since I was out of sheets at the beginning of the year, my mother just shoved a bunch into a little plastic bag for me, and that little plastic bag has been sitting in my little laundry bag pouch thing ever since.
So I reach inside of the little plastic baggy to find only two dryer sheets. But the thing is...I only needed two. I only had two loads of laundry. And while none of this might seem amazing or earth-shattering to you, think about this...Think about all of the loads of laundry that I've had to dry, and the sheets that I had to use...and then factor in the half dozen times or so that I either used two sheets in one load or dropped a sheet on the floor and then didn't take the time to pick it up...and then think about who, if anybody, bothered stealing a dryer sheet or two from me over the course of the semester...and then imagine my mother grabbing an arbitrary number of dryer sheets out of a box and stuffing them into a plastic baggy for me...what are the odds that I'd end up with only two when I only had two loads of laundry to dry?
Kinda messed up isn't it?
I guess the bottom line here is: I need more dryer sheets.
MOVIE QUOTE QUIZ 3
Hadn't had one in a while and I thought it was time. Shouldn't be too hard. Godspeed.
1) I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class, especially since I rule.
2) If "Bangher" was an island off the coast of the Carribean, me and Lucy are stuck in traffic in Jersey.
3) Try some oregano. I hear that works pretty good.
4) Get on the scale son...Get off the scale.
5) What is it with this chick? Does she have beer flavored nipples or something?
6) I have to tell Corey I love her by 1:37.
7) I mean actually slept with someone, not just fucked them on a gaming table.
8) You've lost. You just don't know it yet.
9) The rain on my car is a baptism.
10) I'll trace a chalkline around your dead fucking body!
11) Women will sleep with you if you write a bad book.
12) You know you're wearing a striped shirt with a striped tie, you know that, right?
13) What do you like to do for fun? Oh you like to wiggle and grunt. Me too.
14) Look, boss, I only got one rule. And that's never bet money that you don't have on a dog race with an ex-girlfriend who happens to be a stripper. And you broke that rule.
15) There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
16) I lied. I'm a writer. I give the truth scope.
17) Can you believe this guy keeps confessing? Maybe we ought to grab a lawyer outta one of these BMWs up here.
18) English. I want my son to speak English. It's bad enough his name is Hector.
19) And could the suicide attempts please be postponed until next period.
20) Who's being naive, Kay?
21) I have already given him the best, knowing he is German and would take it anyway.
22) I think you've got the ceremonies mixed up. This is more like a circumcision.
23) The Statue of Liberty is kaput. That's disconcerting.
24) Yes, a bolt of electricity into a huge copper conductor. I thought you lived at a school.
25) No, no. No, see this is a really shit idea. You know why? Because it's really obviously a shit idea.
26) No, no hopping, sir.
27) Do you see any Teletubbies in here? Do you see a slender plastic tag clipped to my shirt with my name printed on it? Do you see a little Asian child with a blank expression on his face sitting outside on a mechanical helicopter that shakes when you put quarters in it? No? Well, that's what you see at a toy store. And you must think you're in a toy store, because you're here shopping for an infant named Jeb.
28) Sons are put on this earth to trouble their fathers.
29) My balloons. Those are my balloons. He stole my balloons! Why didn't anyone tell me he had one of those... things?
30) Well they could surrender to us, but I wouldn't count on it.
31) Wisemen say 'forgiveness is divine but never pay full price for late pizza'.
32) I never met a dame yet that didn't know if she was good-looking or not without being told, and there's some of them that give themselves credit for more than they've got.
33) Well I don't know either. But it's somewhere and it's gonna determine the course of the rest of your life.
34) I'm not gonna kill him. I'm just gonna take a foot off of him. A man can work with one foot.
35) Who's been to Santiago, Chile twice in one year?
Bonus:
-Autopsy said he only had one beer, how many did you have?
-Four
-You're fucking dead, man!
Spring Break is quite a misnomer. I've been busier the last few days than I usually am at school. I'd tell you what I've been up to, but I guarantee that none of it is what most people would call 'exciting'. I've been doing a lot of homework. A lot of writing. A lot of reading. By the time I get back to school, I'll have my homework finished for Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday...most of it anyway.
I read 25th Hour, which was kind of disappointing since it wasn't nearly as well done as the movie. In a lot of ways it was kinda like the Cliff's Notes version of the movie. That's never happened to me before. I mean, I know I've only read like seven books in my entire life, but at least some of those have been books upon which movies were based. Until the other day, I didn't think it was possible for an entire book to be less fleshed out than a movie. But I was wrong. And on top of that I'm a little upset with David Benioff. So much so that I'm not even going to bother finding out if I just spelled his name incorrectly.
If my setences seem brief and lacking in effort that could be because I wrote 30 pages today. 30 pages...that's a personal record. And it's not like I barely broke through my old record. I shattered it by nearly 15 pages. Needless to say, I'm a little tired of looking at this computer.
One more thing before I get to the bulk of the entry...I was just doing laundry and I was struck with an...I don't even know what it was. It was just one of those
things that makes you go 'wow, what are the odds'.
So there I am taking my clothes out of the washer and putting them into the dryer when I noticed: hey, no dryer sheets. So I yell up to my mother inquiring as to whether or not there are dryer sheets hiding somewhere in the house when she says 'we don't have any' in a tone that made me feel kinda stupid for asking in the first place. She said 'we don't have any dryer sheets' the way someone would say 'we don't have any bigfoot costumes'.
And as I was standing there wondering if it was worth the effort to drive to the nearest grocery store, my mother yelled back down 'don't you have any dryer sheets left?' To which I thought, wow what a stupid question, but then I realized that I had my laundry bag thing here with me.
If any of you have seen my laundry bag, you'd know that there's a little pouch on it that holds, among other things, dryer sheets. Since I was out of sheets at the beginning of the year, my mother just shoved a bunch into a little plastic bag for me, and that little plastic bag has been sitting in my little laundry bag pouch thing ever since.
So I reach inside of the little plastic baggy to find only two dryer sheets. But the thing is...I only needed two. I only had two loads of laundry. And while none of this might seem amazing or earth-shattering to you, think about this...Think about all of the loads of laundry that I've had to dry, and the sheets that I had to use...and then factor in the half dozen times or so that I either used two sheets in one load or dropped a sheet on the floor and then didn't take the time to pick it up...and then think about who, if anybody, bothered stealing a dryer sheet or two from me over the course of the semester...and then imagine my mother grabbing an arbitrary number of dryer sheets out of a box and stuffing them into a plastic baggy for me...what are the odds that I'd end up with only two when I only had two loads of laundry to dry?
Kinda messed up isn't it?
I guess the bottom line here is: I need more dryer sheets.
MOVIE QUOTE QUIZ 3
Hadn't had one in a while and I thought it was time. Shouldn't be too hard. Godspeed.
1) I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class, especially since I rule.
2) If "Bangher" was an island off the coast of the Carribean, me and Lucy are stuck in traffic in Jersey.
3) Try some oregano. I hear that works pretty good.
4) Get on the scale son...Get off the scale.
5) What is it with this chick? Does she have beer flavored nipples or something?
6) I have to tell Corey I love her by 1:37.
7) I mean actually slept with someone, not just fucked them on a gaming table.
8) You've lost. You just don't know it yet.
9) The rain on my car is a baptism.
10) I'll trace a chalkline around your dead fucking body!
11) Women will sleep with you if you write a bad book.
12) You know you're wearing a striped shirt with a striped tie, you know that, right?
13) What do you like to do for fun? Oh you like to wiggle and grunt. Me too.
14) Look, boss, I only got one rule. And that's never bet money that you don't have on a dog race with an ex-girlfriend who happens to be a stripper. And you broke that rule.
15) There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
16) I lied. I'm a writer. I give the truth scope.
17) Can you believe this guy keeps confessing? Maybe we ought to grab a lawyer outta one of these BMWs up here.
18) English. I want my son to speak English. It's bad enough his name is Hector.
19) And could the suicide attempts please be postponed until next period.
20) Who's being naive, Kay?
21) I have already given him the best, knowing he is German and would take it anyway.
22) I think you've got the ceremonies mixed up. This is more like a circumcision.
23) The Statue of Liberty is kaput. That's disconcerting.
24) Yes, a bolt of electricity into a huge copper conductor. I thought you lived at a school.
25) No, no. No, see this is a really shit idea. You know why? Because it's really obviously a shit idea.
26) No, no hopping, sir.
27) Do you see any Teletubbies in here? Do you see a slender plastic tag clipped to my shirt with my name printed on it? Do you see a little Asian child with a blank expression on his face sitting outside on a mechanical helicopter that shakes when you put quarters in it? No? Well, that's what you see at a toy store. And you must think you're in a toy store, because you're here shopping for an infant named Jeb.
28) Sons are put on this earth to trouble their fathers.
29) My balloons. Those are my balloons. He stole my balloons! Why didn't anyone tell me he had one of those... things?
30) Well they could surrender to us, but I wouldn't count on it.
31) Wisemen say 'forgiveness is divine but never pay full price for late pizza'.
32) I never met a dame yet that didn't know if she was good-looking or not without being told, and there's some of them that give themselves credit for more than they've got.
33) Well I don't know either. But it's somewhere and it's gonna determine the course of the rest of your life.
34) I'm not gonna kill him. I'm just gonna take a foot off of him. A man can work with one foot.
35) Who's been to Santiago, Chile twice in one year?
Bonus:
-Autopsy said he only had one beer, how many did you have?
-Four
-You're fucking dead, man!
